Then our discussion went to the opposite of this, “Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?” We spoke about how, in the past, things had happened in our lives that God had worked together for our good, even though we couldn’t see it at the time. We discussed that our lives are a tapestry and sometimes we only see the “ugly” when God sees the beautiful picture on the other side. I came away from that lesson feeling that, no matter what, my faith could not be shaken. I felt so STRONG.
The next day, January 14, we found out that my husband, Chris, along with many others, would most likely be losing their jobs in the next few months. STILL STRONG! I know God is in control and nothing can shake me.
The next Monday, January 21, I hurt my back trying to do boot camp exercises. I was in very bad pain, and could barely walk for several days last week. STILL STRONG! Satan would not get me down. I can do ALL THINGS through Christ who gives me strength.
And then Thursday night, January 24…my 16 year old daughter, Maddie, tells me she has a lump in her breast. I assure her that it is probably nothing…and make a doctor’s appointment just to be on the safe side. We couldn’t see the doctor until Monday…so I had ALL weekend to try to stay positive. SORTA STRONG…until my mind began to dwell just a moment too long on the “What ifs” and then progressed to “Why us”.
I know that this doesn’t compare to what Job felt…but I can truly say that by Sunday afternoon, with the pain in my back, the start of a head cold coming on, Chris’ uncertain job situation and then Maddie’s possible ordeal she could be facing…I had a moment where I just felt so incredibly weak. NOT STRONG AT ALL !
Yesterday, I went back and read Habakkuk, and what the Lord said to him, “Look at the nations and watch--and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told.” Hab 1:5 This reminded me that God has a plan, even though we may not see it.
I also went back and visited old Job…and found this in Job 42 “Then Job replied to the LORD: "I know that you can do anything, and no one can stop you. You asked, 'Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?' It is I--and I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me. You said, 'Listen and I will speak! I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.' I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance." It took everything that Job went through to make him SEE the Lord and KNOW His goodness.
For now, Chris still has a job and we are trusting God to provide a new one, if need be. Maddie’s doctor’s appointment went fine…nothing to worry about. Everything was normal and she is perfectly healthy. My back even feels much better today…I think it is on the mend!
God is good and He is strong….so I don’t always have to be. Forgive me Lord for my moment of weakness and ignorance. Your ways are far too wonderful for me to comprehend. Thank you for the little Job moments that remind me of these things.
